That IS a fun fact so I don't want to get any flak about it. I know you all count on me, and I didn't want to let you down. There is a pretty funny one coming in two days. Does anyone else feel like they're a TV show today? If this is too long (cause it is rather long) tell me and I will send pieces of the long ones to you along with shorter ones. Bow down to Bungholio! This is almost like I have a job. The only problem is, I'm not getting paid. So I want you all to send me five dollars, or a gold watch (Rolex preferred) every week if you wish to continue your subscription. Especially neil, that guy ows me so much money, it's not funny. Also if you know someone who might appreciate my sense of humor, send me their address, or tell them to write me, and I'll send these. Sorry, if you were not an original subscriber the price will be one large cheese pizza or a box of snot per week. Don't even bother asking what for. It's fun playing with Microsoft Bookshelf 95. It's got a thesaurus, a dictionary, a book of qutations, an encyclopedia, an atlas, a chronology, and an almanac. Again I say, "wheefun." I was using it a moment ago and when I scrolled, and stopped randomly, this is what I got.
Synonyms-Knock back a few
Emotion, religion and morality: Morality: Drunkenness. Drug-taking
get drunk (verb)
get drunk, have too much, have one over the limit, drink deep, drink hard, drink like a fish, drink to get tight liquor up, tank up, crack a bottle, knock back a few, bend one's elbow, lush, bib, tipple, fuddle, booze, tope, guzzle, swig, swill, soak, souse, hit the bottle, DRINK go on the spree, go on a bender go pub-crawling, pub-crawl drown one's sorrows, commune with the spirits quaff, carouse, wassail, sacrifice to Bacchus,
The Original Roget's Thesaurus of English Words and Phrases
Ok that's that. As you all know, I have another source of inspiration and that's school.(Hope all you Elmira, Corning, Horseheads, etc. type people have fun on your first day of school. By the way The Times Dylan Has Had To Run(or at least jog) to Get to the Bus Counter is now up to two.) Remember the smart kidney incident? Well here's some more.
Overheard on the Bus-"You're playing with dead goat balls?!? Why not play with live goat balls?"
Overheard on the Bus Jr.-"Will you be my daddy? Will you punish me if I'm bad?" (This from a kid who's like 6'2" and probably weighs like 240.)
From Rather Weird English Teacher Mr. Eckely-"You're all sitting there looking at me like you have the DNA of banana trees." My Bio teacher, up next, would probably argue that.
From Mr. Cook, slightly odd Biology teacher whose hair looks a bit like Einstein's.- "If you subtract 280 days from your birthday, guess what you get? Hehe. Ask your parent's what they were doing that night. Hehe"
Another one from Mr. Eckely-"Most of you did well on the quiz, however there was one boy in the other class who got a 0. Here's what I think, in a matching quiz, if you don't know them it's very hard to get them all wrong. Therefore it is just as hard to get a 100% as it is to get a 0." That's what he said, at least. I could argue with him, but I'm afraid he'll fall on me.
I thought of this one and it has nothing to do with school other than the fact that I thought of it in school, but it is a good Point to Ponder-What exactly is a Philadelphia Phillie?
People you do know I'm not making this up. I couldn't if I tried.
That's all I have for school. But there's lots more to follow. Coming up next on the Dylan Flipse is weird show- What's that stuff on my shoe? Followed by- For that matter where are my pants? Seriously though folks, I have an example. Take my sister.......please! Hahahaha. Ba-dup-bing. I won't quit my day job, I promise. Has anyone seen the commercial where the quarterback gets knocked out and he thinks he's Batman? Well it's funny.
Election 96 update. Did anyone else get a survry emailed to them about 4 days ago? It was about the presidential election and about where the candidates stand on cretain issues. Just curious. Neil-Do you know if Harry Browne is on the ballot in NY? He is in PA. Vote Browne/Jorgensen. Bob Dole is gonna get killed in the election. (News flash, that is of course if he dosen't die first) We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.............................. Did I do that? Erkel!!!
I'm gonna go into Bookshelf 95 and pick somthing random again- intercourse (în´ter-kôrs´, -kors´) noun
1. Dealings or communications between persons or groups.
2. Sexual intercourse.
[Middle English entercours, commercial dealings, from Old French entrecours, from Latin intercursus, a running between, interposition, from past participle of intercurrere, to mingle with : inter-, inter- + currere, to run.]
The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Third Edition copyright © 1992 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Electronic version licensed from InfoSoft International, Inc. All rights reserved.
You guys know I would not lie to you and that what came up. Kind of funny though........... Announcer-As many of you know the Fun Fact itself and definition of a word there ought to be are a part of every FFOTD. If you see a feature, like it, and would like to see it regularly, let us know at dflipse@csrlink.net and it just may happen. Some examples of said Features are Random Thoughts, The Heard/Thought of at School Today, The Random Drawing from Bookshelf 95 or Encarta 96, and the soon to be seen In the News. (Well maybe.Maybe not.) If you would like complementary tickets to our show and plan to be in the greater Williamsport area, drop on by anytime and you can have the privilage of watching me write for hours on end!
Purple Cow, Inc.
I have an idea for all camp and trip type people. You know how one person has a tendency to forget things, well like 8 people can remember alot of things. What I'm gonna do is mail you the beginnings of a list. It should contain all the things we should never forget. It's subject should always be Memories or Re:Memories or somthing like that. Here's the way it works. When you recieve a copy of the list, look over it. Anything you wish to add do so. If it is a single word like knish OR spackle just add it to the list. If it is a sentence, or a paragraph write your name under it. Then send the new version of Memories to me. Always try to keep them correctly dated. I will take all the new entries and compile them. Then once a day, week, or eon or somthing I will mail out new copies. There is no need to keep old copies as my system keps all my mail and I will mail you any copy. If y'all like the idea write me and I will start it in a few days.
My Lord, one person can write alot when all they have to do is one hour of homework, and their friends don't come over. Well, I think I set a new personal record for longest single piece of writing outside of school, and there's still and hour till bedtime.
I will now choose random words out of the o-sacred Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy- he nonexistence hear flying to of he from any badly.
Here's some more questions- What's your name? What's your favorite color? How tall is your pet iguana? What IS that stuff on my shoes? Does everybody really want to be naked and famous? Or are The Presidents of the United States of America just half right? Are those real? What is a Phillie? What happened to OS/2 Warp? Why are none of the people in my homeroom in any of my classes? Why did they call homeroom homebase at my old school? If a tree fall in a forest, but no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? Now, if the same tree fall on a beaver, does the sound made by the beaver count? I dunno, ask your mother.
I got mail from Ellen in the last five minutes. How do I know, I checked it five minutes ago, and I just checked it and there was mail the second time. Noka, Amazing. I'm still trying to get my computer to say "You've got mail." Right now it kind of does this little tone thinge. YES, I am the all master of, "You've got mail." Tomarrow I might try to record buts, buts, buttts and change it to that. Or maybe "You've got mail, buttwipe. Heh heh heh heh." That would be cool.
I think I'm going prematurely bald.
Well, it's probably taken you about an hour to read this, with your banana tree DNA and all. I"ll end it here, for now. Dum-dum-dummmm.
Abligo (AB-lig-goh) n.
One who prides himself on not even knowing what day of the week it is.
Ahhhhhh, the water's going the wrong way.
